"Raising Boys"

After my last post, I had lots of lovely comments on facebook and here about my parenting philosophy but I have to say that it mostly comes from my own upbringing and being introduced to "Raising Boys" by Steve Biddulph at an early stage in my parenting journey.  I can't find it anywhere so I'm assuming I have leant it to someone at some point.  I tend to feel that if you lend books you have to be prepared to never see them again!

If you have boys and haven't read this book then can I suggest that you get on to Amazon/the Book Depository/Borders or wherever you can find books these days and get a copy or 2.  It is full of the most wonderfully freeing common sense advice.

I also stumbled across this article yesterday about The 8 things boys really need from their parents, which gives a lot of the same kind of advice.  Basically boys have to be boys in order to become men.  They need to be physical, loud and boisterous and no amount of trying to make them sit nicely, like girls are often more capable of doing, is going to help.  It will only make them feel inadequate and resentful.

Obviously we have our moments here, one of the boys in particular does my head in at the moment, but I can remember back to when Archie was at the same stage (See, not him for a change Christine!) and know that there is hope.  He needs a lot of exercise, adventure, and danger - I foresee a career in the SAS.  Equally he is such a loving, sweet and generous boy - he'd definitely give you his last Rolo (except they are made by Nestle so he's not allowed to have them...!).

As another friend pointed out privately, it's all been about team work.  Those of you who know us well know that John is (and always has been) very hands on, partly because he needs a lot of exercise too!  He does work A LOT and woe betide anyone who interrupts, but there have always been runs, bike rides, football and now there is also a lot of bonding over movies that "the boys HAVE to watch"!  The long hours he worked and commuted in Edinburgh were very hard going for all of us and I think I was probably heading for a wee padded room and lovely white jacket somewhere.  Coming here, while hard going in it's own way, has given us back our family time which is so precious.  So err, not one to be gushy but thanks Mate.  Hilariously, he does actually read this and often asks why I haven't posted!

I should also mention my brother and his great contributions to the upbringing of my boys.  Unc has always been as involved as a single young bloke can be, always coming over for birthdays, helping out with football parties, taking the big ones out to Edinburgh on their own for a day and so on.   He has never held back from telling me how gutted he was/is that I have taken his nephews and neice away.  He is great at keeping in touch with them on skype and facebook, never one to miss the chance at a bit of a wise crack.  We all miss Unc heaps.

For Grandma, Unc and anyone who might be interested, I'm planning a wee holiday round up post next...

Edited to add:  you can now find me on facebook if you fancy it...  Haven't worked out how to add a sidebar link so if anyone can help that would be great!

Bondi

Today was the first day of the holidays and the first day of Husband going away for a week to the Big Smoke.  He is off to Sydney to take part in a series of lectures at New College, and rather than zip back up and down everyday they are putting him up for the week.  We decided that, since he wasn't required until dinnertime, that we would take him down and spend the day together exploring a bit more of Sydney.  New College is part of the University of New South Wales and is very close to Bondi so we thought we would head there for lunch and go from there.  My parents had been to Bondi a number of years ago, before we came here, and reported back that they had been distinctly under-whelmed by the most famous beach in Australia, so I wasn't expecting too much.  My first thought was that it was a bit like Portrush where my Mother grew up in N.Ireland!  It is much more commercial than our beaches in Newcastle and to be honest I'll take Merewether any day, but we did like it and had fun.

We had lunch in a great pizzeria "Papa Giovannis".  The owner was delighted by all the children and wanted to know were they all ours?   Were we Catholic?  If not why did we have so many?   Why didn't we stop after the girl?  Were we having more?  Were we mad? and so on!  John chatted to his son for ages about Italian football and the kids were given samples of all the different gelato that they make!  If you're ever in Bondi, tell them the crazy Irish/Scottish football-mad family with all the kids sent you!  The pizzas were great and the kids meals were fantastic.

We took our coffees and gelati to the beach and the usual running/jumping/racing competitions ensued.

It didn't take long before Smallest got soaked!  Thankfully there were spare hoodies, warm sunshine and kind Big Brothers.

I do love exploring Sydney.  While I like living in a much smaller city I get a real buzz whenever I see all the skyscrapers, I love the busy streets and all the quirky shops and the unique characters in the different suburbs.  If we had had longer I would have loved to have a walk  or visit other less well-known parts like Bronte and Coogee - another time.

Miss Meg and I will be back in Sydney on Saturday for Mary Poppins so maybe we'll try and fit in a bit more exploring without all the boys.

Counting Your Blessings

My Mother used to sing a little gospel chorus to my brother and myself when we were little which started like this "Count your blessings, name them one by one".  I was humming it to myself in the car earlier today as I thought how 'blessed' I am.  I am very fortunate in that I tend to be a cup-half-full type anyway, but every now and then I like to remind myself to "Count my blessings" and try and remind myself to be a blessing to others in turn, "Pay-it-Forward" style.     

It was my birthday last week and I was reminded that I have people I can call "Friends" all over the world, literally!  I have been blessed with good friendships in all the different places in which I have lived.  Part of that is due to the fact that I tend to just butt in to people's conversations until they give in and include me!

I live somewhere near beautiful beaches, where the sun shines a bit more than it did in Edinburgh!  Beaches aren't everyone's cup of tea, Husband for one, doesn't get the fascination, but I love them.  I'm not really one for lying on them, but walking by them, having a coffee with friends at them, watching the power of the waves, swimming at them are things I love. 

My kids drive me demented.  I'm not the chilled out Earth-mother type I always hoped I would be, but sometimes (!) they are great!  They have always had a very dry sense of humour which Smallest Boy (2)already demonstrates.  This evening I asked him which was our car as we walked back with our shopping bags, and quick as a flash he pointed to a red car a few spaces away from ours and said "Let's take that one" with a totally straight face.  When I laughed and said he was funny, he replied "I know"!  They have endless energy as demonstrated by this trampolining and 2 lots of tennis lessons this evening.

We have a roof over our heads.  Ok it's really about 4 rooms too small for us and we only ever meant to stay for 6 months, but it's convenient, our Landlord is great and we don't know what the future holds.

Whether or not it turns out to be the best move, we have had the fantastic opportunity to expand our horizons and move, albeit temporarily, to the other side of the world.  What a great experience for our kids (and us too) to see other parts of the world, hear different opinions, try new things,  all of which will help to form the people they will become, hopefully open-minded, understanding, caring individuals who are confident and brave.   

Family that I love and miss, but who still bother to Skype with me regularly and abuse me on Facebook!

That's probably enough for today, I had intended to mention some Crochet, but I'll keep that for another day.

Give it a go - Count YOUR Blessings, I dare you.